A Quote For Friday

“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.” 
― George Carlin

8 Picture Books That Make Us Wish We Were Kids Again

8 Picture Books That Make Us Wish We Were Kids Again.  Follow Link to see all : Monkey See : NPR.

Where the Legal System Collides in the Land Known as the Gray Area

Reuters – Jan. 23, 2014 – A Kansas man who donated sperm to a lesbian couple so they could have a child plans to appeal a judge’s ruling that he is the legal father of the girl and must pay child support, his lawyer said on Thursday.

The donor, William Marotta, 47, has been ordered to pay child support because the parties involved did not go through a licensed physician in the artificial insemination process, as is required under Kansas State law.

Marotta met Jennifer Schreiner and her partner, Angela Bauer after he answered an ad the 2 women had posted on Craigslist for a sperm donor.   The parties entered into a contract that, in part, relieved Marotta of any parental rights and responsibilities for the child.  Later, financial hardship forced Jennifer Schreiner to apply for and she was granted state financial assistance. During the financial assistance application process, Schreiner, it is alleged, denied knowing who the donor was.   It was some time later that DCF (Department of Child & Family Services) via more vigorous questioning of Schreiner unveiled the contract that named Mr. Marotta as the sperm donor.  DCF then sought through the court system to have Marotta declared the father and be held responsible for the $6,000 DCF had already paid out to Schreiner as well as hold Marotta accountable for future child support.

Now the real fun begins as the attorneys and the court system duke it out on the appeal.  It will likely be a lengthy process and very costly to Marotta and the State of Kansas.This begs the question…Does state law sometimes go too far in regard to their control over our personal choices, decisions and lifestyle? There are good and valid arguments for and against, using the case against Mr. Marotta as an example.

On the one hand, there are the 3 adults who came to agreement in this particular situation and who were (seemingly) intelligent and had the foresight to put it in writing. Did all of any of the 3 participants know beforehand about the state law that would recognize this agreement only if the insemination process was overseen by a licensed physician? If so, did they just choose to ignore it?  Or, were all 3 simply caught completely unaware?

On the other hand, there is a now 4-year-old child involved, who can’t speak for herself. Not to mention that, at this point in time, her mother (Schreiner) is in need of financial assistance.

There are at least two sides to any issue.  In this case, the first side is interpretation and enforcement of the law.  Any law, as written, is black and white, states specific parameters and is extremely rigid. The second side is comprised of the gray area and all of its moving parts that include but are not limited to: The who, what, when, where, why and what if’s.   That’s where it all gets interesting.

If we stick to only what the law dictates and just go with that, then per the Kansas Parentage Act, the parties failed to perform under the Act by enlisting a licensed physician during the artificial insemination process.  Therefore, Mr. Marotta is this child’s father and legally responsible for child support until the child is of legal age.

What about Mr. Marotta?  Doesn’t he have any rights?  Marotta, except for the child borne by Schriener, has no other children.  He says, he just wanted to help a couple have a child.  He had/has no interest in fathering a child or being part of this child’s life. This was all, allegedly, covered in the contract that was agreed upon by all parties.  This all may sound kind of cold and calculated to some of us.   But, what about all of that frozen sperm sitting in sperm banks all over the country?  Those donors will remain anonymous to all of those children that are born as a result of their sperm contribution.  And, by law, they are protected against any attempt made to reveal their identity in the future for any reason, financial or otherwise.  Having this safety net in place makes the decision to donate much easier on the donor.  This is precisely in line with the decision Mr. Marotta made and it was made with the same provisions in place.  The only difference is, Marotta agreed to this under a privately written contract devised with Ms. Schreiner and Ms. Bauer and without the oversight of a licensed physician during the insemination process.

What about Ms. Schreiner and her then partner, Ms. Bauer?  Since Schreiner carried the child, she is the birth mother and this known fact would appear to be pretty straightforward and indisputable.  Ms. Bauer, at the time, was in a relationship with Schreiner and took part in the process of placing the ad on Craigslist to locate a sperm donor. It’s not clear at this point if Bauer was part of the actual contractual agreement.   Either way, is it possible that Bauer could ever be held accountable for child support?  She may be voluntarily contributing but no mention has been made either way. (The impression is that the relationship between Bauer and Schreiner has ended).  By law, the answer to whether Bauer could be liable for child support is likely no, given that she has no biological connection to the child. There is no mention of adoption of the child by Bauer.  Morally, well that’s another question.

Now let’s go back once again to the voiceless child in this case.  At some point in the years to come she is going to learn the truth.  If we could put ourselves in her shoes at that moment in time, just what would we make out of all of this confusion?  What role will the law play then?  None, of course.  Naming Mr. Marotta as her legal parent now may help financially but it isn’t going to magically turn him into a stable father figure in her life.  Is it better that she will at least know who her biological father is, even if there is never a relationship bond forged between them?  Or, would it have been better if none of this had been revealed and her mother later told her that she was conceived via an anonymous sperm donor?

These are just a few of the many moving parts in the land known as the gray area.